Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
