im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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