I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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