Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
