We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
i think im in europe. pls send help
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