New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
fuck your aforementioned shoe
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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