I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize