Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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