Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I think your dad took our porno
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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