So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I am naked and annoyed.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Enjoy the penises
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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