I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize
