Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
