yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize