is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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