I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
