Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
