My brain says no but my pants say off.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
