K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I bet he comes in French.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
