Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
