I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
