bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
