Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Randomize
