Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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