oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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