Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
