Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
