scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
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