If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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