first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
barbara walters just said penis...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Randomize
