Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
