Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
