His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
