My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
