There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
