i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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