rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
