just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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