You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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