so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Randomize
