I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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