it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
It's shark week go big or go home
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
