And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
