The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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