My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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