My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize