Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
