I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
