I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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