Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Sponge bath it is.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
