I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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